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Zenlei Speaks! If you
have a relationship question for us, ask Zenlei. We will do our best to answer it here!
Your questions and our responses follows: Q: Why is it that I seem to always end up in destructive relationships? A: This is an extremely interesting question and one that I am eager to answer. There is an old saying.
It goes like this: "Where attention goes, enegy flows, and results shows". When you are driving
down the road and all of a sudden you start to look to your left, what happens is you will also start to drive toward your
left. Again, "where attention goes, energy flows, and results shows". Well, I
am sorry to tell you this but the question you posed goes much further than it may seem. Your mind conditioning is such that it always seeks to re-create what it knows best and is more familiar with even
if that situation hurts. We are conditioned to be more willing to accept something that hurts than we are conditioned
to embrace something new. In your case, you, by your conditioning, would rather enter into the known, (a distructive
relationship), rather than an unknown, (a non-distructive relationship). In this case you are more comfortable in recreating
this patten of being involved in distructive relationships than you are willing to enter the unknown. Your mind, because
of past relationships, may have began to attract this patten of intimacy and abuse as one and you therefore may have mentally
accepted the fact that in order to enjoy one, (intimacy), you must accept the other, (abuse). This is a powerfully sad situation
that cannot be totally addressed here but you may contact me directly and see if I am able to help!
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